"Self Esteem Does NOT Arrive By Fedex!"

My clients and students have often heard me say that self esteem does NOT arrive by Fedex! Nobody gives you confidence.  Nobody puts self esteem on your desk for you.  You have to build it yourself.  Confidence and self esteem are like gas in your car.  The tank's never always full.  When it's empty, you have to fill it.  You are responsible for your own self esteem and confidence.

So how do you do that?  First know that it is a skill, and you can learn this skill.  There are many times when we need to build our self esteem, but we especially need to do it when we are going to do something difficult, like give a speech, hold a press conference or run a meeting, or communicate in a second language.  There are times when we need it just because we are feeling down.  We sometimes need an urgent shipment of self esteem or confidence!

Though I have a complete tool box of self esteem raising tricks and techniques, I have some instant favorites.

1. Change your posture.  That's sort of an instant freebee.  Just by changing your posture, you immediately feel STRONGER, SMARTER, more CONFIDENT.  (Studies support this!)
2. Do the 'God/Goddess walk'.  Seriously, walk around like you are a goddess.  It feels GOOD!
3. Tell yourself that you are wonderful.  (I like to say, "You know what I like about me?  EVERYTHING!)
4. SMILE.  Yes, studies about the brain reveal that we can create emotion with just a facial expression.
5. Make contact with your "Balcony" People -- the people who always believe you are wonderful.
6. Avoid the people who are negative, and bring you down. 
7. Quick... make a gratitude list.  Write as many things as you can of things for which you are grateful.
8.  Dance.  Yes dance.  You don't even need music.  Only for a minute or two. It will make you laugh.
9.  Look up.  When you look up, it reminds you to think of your 'higher self."
10.  Tell yourself... "I love you, I believe in you." (If you still don't believe it, say it again!)

There.  That's the instant list.  There are plenty of other techniques that you can learn and develop your own signature tool box of raising your own self-esteem.  The important thing is to actively work on-- daily, when ever you need it. (Especially when you need it!)


"Lisa-isms"



Self esteem does NOT arrive by FEDEX!
--Lisa